Wealthy Men for Money or Love Page 2
Homework 1. Write down what would be a comfortable monthly salary and lifestyle to do what you want to do and research how much it will cost, include everything, including entertainment and the odd bottle of wine or cigarettes, down to the last penny.
2. Do some online research about the sex industry and sugar babies and courtesan’s do’s and don’ts and write a journal of everything that you think suites your circumstance. In the rest of this book you will find a lot of subjects and keywords to help your research.
3. Write down the circumstances or desires that are making or have made you consider work in the sex industry or to seek a relationship or patronage from a wealthy person.
4. Write down what in your ideal world would prevent you from working in the sex industry.
❦3 Why Be a High Priced Escort?
One night on the 6 o’clock radio news in 2011 I listened to a report about the economic recovery and how it is affecting women seeking employment. The news item stated that 90% of available jobs are going to men, not women, but 40% of women are the main income earners in a household, also that women earn 33% less than men when they do have jobs. It was a shock that even in the 21st Century and slow economy women can’t get a break. Do they expect women to live on welfare all their lives? Will they give out free contraception and abortions and sex education to prevent single mothers? Are they going to care for the homeless children and other dependents because the woman of the house can’t pay the rent? We all understand that answer is NO, but our choices in the straight world are shrinking. People get roused up about exploitation and sex worker rights and I wholeheartedly agree there needs to be legislative help, such as raising the legal age of workers in all sex related industries, but sex workers also need to start helping themselves. Providers, AKA working girls, need to meet the straight world halfway if the straight world is to really listen and treat them with respect. Working girls and single women need to learn how to protect themselves by minimizing their own risks; to do that is to follow the procedures of a high-end companion or sugar baby. How the high-end courtesan market developed is because there are some of us who were brought up with manners and education but fell on hard times, often quite when too young to fully realize we still had our whole lives ahead of us. This is because since babies we’ve had manners and propriety banged into our heads 24/7, so if we suddenly end up in altered circumstances the more sensitive ones think we are washed up already and deserve it, ironic as that is. As modern day well brought up women we mostly go into sex work to pay for college fees, medical bills, mortgages, and children. Our well-meaning parents taught us to prevent trouble by not standing out in a bad way. Manners and deportment were trained into me from since I can remember with ballroom dance classes since I was seven, pony club and finishing school in my teens, modern dance and art studies and attending socialite gatherings and riding in foxhunts in my twenties. In the upper levels of wealth and society men treat all women with respect and will open many kinds of doors for beautiful sociable women. Which means to say the safest and most lucrative end of the sex industry and dating is the upper mid to upper class and high spending people who prefer companions with refined style, conversation skills, good manners, good etiquette, integrity, and most of all discretion. For long as prostitution has existed there has been a high-end market and a low-end market. In the 21st century with the Internet you don’t have to rely on a madam or agency or somebody in the know to screen clients to make sure they are high-end. But that does not mean just because you can screen high-end clients or dates you will close the deal or get a long-term arrangement or they recommend you to their friends. You have to look and act high-end to be a high-end personal companion or sugar baby, and it’s not something a person can learn from a fashion magazine or Miss Manners on your own or in a short amount of time. That is why finishing school and refining one’s self is also called cultivation and taught from childhood. Cultivation takes time, practice, application and self-discipline and doing the work and really wanting to do it. But that is not to say the basics can’t be taught in a few months for the purposes of getting higher paying clients and making your work environment safer. In rough economic times more and more women enter the sex industry, but there is not enough training on how to do it safely and how to get respectful clients. This is a whole bunch of tragic messed up lives waiting to happen. I’ve been there myself and I’ve also been there as a shoulder to cry on for many other women who’ve gone through it. If I knew what I know now when I started or even mid career I would have made a lot more money with a lot less work and wasted a lot less time years later in therapy and multiple bad relationships. If we want the straight world to respect us as working girls and boys, we as professional women and gentlemen need to take back our own power, create our own safety procedures, and respect ourselves.
Homework 1. Write down a list of what you think you have to be a VIP escort or have a relationship with a wealthy man.
2. Write down a list of what you think you need to be a VIP Escort or have a relationship with a wealthy man.
3. Write down what you think you will be like when you have everything you need to be a VIP Escort or have a relationship with a wealthy man.
❦4 Mental Preparation
Beautiful beginners and young faces are always welcome in this industry if they are over 18 or 21 years of age. But there is an important warning workers do a lot better in this industry if they’ve already experienced life with a normal straight job and lifestyle and normal dating or living in a relationship for 3 or for 4 years first. This helps them understand some of how the man thinks and what he wants, and how normal life works for when it’s time for a woman to leave the industry. If you don’t get a few years life experience first you could make some super life altering blunders: for example I once refused a job at a consulate in Paris with diplomatic immunity, instead to continue as a courtesan and go to art school in London. I hadn’t come to grips (handled the guilt) with what I was doing to connect the fact that I could have worked at the consulate and studied art the Sorbonne and it would skyrocket my career and life on all levels. I was a young beginner, 18, runaway from a conservative too strict family at 16, so I understand those kind moral concerns, desperations, and guilt trips. But we do it for the money pure and simple and as high-end companions we choose to do it for the lifestyle. I did it to escape a troubled relationship with my family and to pay for college and to see the world, and I’ve known many women who’ve done it to give their children a better life. I had no romantic ideas about courtesans. I did read a lot of historical romance novels as a teen, because my step-mother fed them to me instead of fashion magazines because her mother said fashion magazines were all about sex and she was right in her own way. My reasons for working in the sex and companionship industry were money so I could study what I wanted and live and travel where I wanted without needing a man. In the 21st century most women still need or rely on a man in some indirect or direct way to survive in a career or business or domestic situation, because that is what women and men are taught since children to believe and feel even if we don’t know realize it. The other reason for mental preparation and focus and the most important reason is safety and for two reasons:
1. To improve yourself to attract good quality safe people.
2. If your head is somewhere else or you missed a lesson on screening or meeting a new person you could miss a warning sign and land in trouble or worse.
I never had a bad client and was never busted and neither should you be. Our-upbringings and outside influences cloud our heads as a belief system, AKA brainwashing, what we have to do is clear our heads of the fear and the guilt trips that cloud our senses.
Homework The first step is to do what you have to do to clear your headspace, schedule, cash for materials, and study space, so you can focus and wrap your head around everything in this book. There is a lot to work to do including but not limited to fashion styling, grooming, etiquette, speaking voice, marketing, cl
ient screening, life coaching, presentation and web site, discretion, personal health and safety, basic business and budget management, personal entertainment and conversation. You don’t have to have model good looks or Sports Illustrated body, but you do have to be 23 years of age or older, with at least some college or European education or very well read. Reading good books can help you in a number of ways, depending on what type of books you read they can help you clear your head and fake a private college education, as well as improve your conversation and observation skills. Also a must is a friendly professional and social attitude and willing to take instruction and the self-discipline to work on you yourself and never stop improving.
❦ 5 Who Are You?
The following 42 questions are to help you see who you are and how it relates to or can be used to your advantage or as a caution for work as a professional companion or provider or seeking a date. Write down the questions and your answers in your digital or hand written diary. Some of the questions might hit close to the bone or bring up stuff they hadn’t thought of for some people, it’s ok; this is only between you and your diary, work your way through the questions and add your own if they come up. Add notes of anything you want to change and record the changes, so you can see if and how you develop as a person and your ability to handle things, or not.
1) Stage Name?
2) Ethnicity and Nationality – Caucasian, African American, Indian, Australian, Latin, Asian, Arabic. Etc
3) Age – true age and the age people mistake you for?
4) Education Level – Elementary, High School, Some College, Full College, or Advanced Degree. Include majors?
5) What languages do you speak and how fluent?
6) What is your sex - Female, Male, She-male, or Transsexual?
7) What sex were you at birth if since changed?
8) What is you sexual orientation - Hetro, Gay, Bi, or Lesbian?
9) What is your relationship status – single, married, divorced, or dating?
10)What is your relationship orientation – monogamous or polyamorous?
11) What are your sexual fetishes if any– such as bondage, corsets, shoes, groups, spanking, sex in public places etc.?
12) Do you have any professional sex industry or adult industry experience?
13) Have you ever made a sex tape?
14) Have you posted nude or semi nude or suggestive photos of yourself on the Internet ever? 15) Has anybody else posted nude or semi nude or suggestive photos of you on the Internet? 16) Are nude, semi nude, or suggestive photos of you on the web at this moment?
17) Have you ever flirted with somebody to get what you want?
18)Have you ever had sex or been intimate with somebody to get what you want or more money? 19) Have you ever been a kept woman or man or stay at home housewife?
20) What are the city, state, and country of where you work or intend to work in this industry? 21) What are the local escort guides and places to advertise and have you read them?
22)How much per hour or day are the top 20 most expensive escorts or courtesans in your city? 23)What are age ranges of men and women you are physically attracted to?
24)What personality types attract you sexually? 25)What Body types turn you on sexually?
26)What is the fashion style/s of people you are attracted too?
27)What is your current occupation or studies?
28) Will your straight career or further education or social prospects be affected if people found out that you were a prostitute?
29)What is your current monthly income?
30) Is your current income enough to pay for the things you need and pay off debts?
31) Do you have something you want money for such as school, travel, car, or a business?
32)What is your social background – Working class, Middle Class, Upper Class?
33)What is the social background of your closest friends?
34)Did you attend finishing school or deportment and etiquette training, if any, and what did you learn?
35)Did you suffer any childhood or adult traumas – accident, beatings, sexual abuse, mugged, military duty, etc.?
36)Do you attend regular or off and on therapy for mental or emotional issues and for what?
37)Will you continue to attend therapy while working as an escort?
38) Do you know of any friends who see professional companions or escorts?
39)Do you know anybody who works in the adult entertainment or sex industries?
40) Have you ever had a conversation with a person in the adult or sex industries?
41) Do you have any near future goals to use the money that you earn in the sex industry?
42)Do you practice safe sex?
❦6 Crash Course In Discretion
No matter if you have only one occasional client or sugar daddy or you are full time professional, the risks and precautions are the same. Below are outline tips covering the subject of Discretion and some of its many subtopics to give you a taste of why it’s important on multiple levels. This chapter is all homework.
Discretion dis·cre·tion noun /disˈkreSHən/ 1) The quality of behaving or speaking in such a way as to avoid causing offense or revealing private information – “she knew she could rely on his discretion”
Definition by Google Dictionary.
Discretion is necessary on multiple levels for multiple reasons. It is both your loved ones’ safety shield and your safety shield, as well as the basic principle of what makes you valuable to high-end clients.
1) Keep your sex industry life secret. Nobody but your personal assistant or another person in the biz should know what you do. As much as it would be a release and an ideal world, your straight life friends, fellow workers, and loved ones knowing you are a sex worker permanently scars their thoughts and happy memories of you; with or without unconditional love it is a hard load to carry. Even if it is accepted on TV and in movies it is not accepted in real life human emotions and memories. During training we will explore different ways and reasons to protect your privacy and your clients’ privacy.
2) Don’t attract trouble. If you want respectful clients and you don’t want to get hijacked by a pimp or busted by police, hotel staff, or outed by your nosy roommate, then you don’t look or act like a hooker or stripper or nightclub junkie. Don’t hangout in places where there are junkies and pimps and dealers other suspect people and don’t hang out with those kinds of people. You want to stand out from the crowd, but in a good way that doesn’t arouse suspicion and that includes whom you hang out with, how you behave, and what you look like. This is a large subject with many subtopics, which will be explained further during training including fashion and grooming styling options and upper-social-class deportment and etiquette skills so you can stand out from the crowd the right way.
3) Never show your face online or in anything to do with the industry. A client or competition or your roommate’s pals can use face recognition software to find your real life profile anywhere online. This can negatively affect your straight life and career and relationship chances present and future. Before you start in this biz take down all photos from the web showing your face, body parts, or any distinguishing marks, such as tattoos, scars, birthmarks, or body piercings. More about photos and what type of photos you should post online and send to clients during training.
4) Use separate cell phones, voicemail, and email. Never use you own personal phone or home or day-job phones or voicemail, or email or address for your secret life. Never leave a phone, paper, or email trail of what you are doing, or leave it anywhere accessible to others except your personal assistant. More on how to set up and manage your communications, and how to choose a memorable but not obvious stage name, during training.
5) Don’t flash your money about. The first red flag that makes people think a woman is dating or having sex for money is when she’s wearing expensive clothes and jewelry, flashing wads of cash, and or driving a car they know she can’t afford on
her salary or circumstance. This can also make a woman a target for being robbed or ripped off by boyfriends, and family. neighbors, acquaintances, and friends
6) Less clients, more money, less risk. "Less is more" is a theme that runs though most of this training manual on levels you may not have thought about. Seeing a lot of clients doesn't make more money and less stress it makes less money and more stress. Wealthy high paying people expect exclusivity as well as refinement, which is why discretion is paramount. Dating many people stresses out your mental and physical health so, you end up neurotic and looking ragged and not worth the money clients are paying. mistakes in section of training is about screening clients to find the right client and pay for you and how to manage your money and time.
When you are stressed out you make discretion and safety as well. This
Homework 1. Write out a discretion plan, how will you keep your sex industry or dating wealthy men life secret.
2. Get tools into place to facilitate discrete dating, such as disposable cell phones, separate email and voicemail accounts, and social networking profiles
3. Take down any photos showing your face or identifying features such as tattoos. This includes your straight life profiles. You don’t want anybody tagging you as a hooker. (Note: if you are a professional model and don’t mind people knowing you are a companion for hire you can charge a lot more as a companion.)
4. Register a consultancy business to process credit cards, track business costs, and pay taxes.